You feed me when I’m hungry
You keep water in my dish
You let me sleep on anything
Or in any place I wish
You sometimes let me lick your hands
Or even lick your face
Despite the fact I’ve licked myself
In every private place
You taught me how to come when called
You taught me how to sit
You always let me go outside
So I can take a s**t
You’ll always have my loyalty
Up to the bitter end
Cause after all, it’s plain to see
You are my best friend